Wednesday, October 13, 2010

The One Where I am Embarrassed

Webster's Dictionary gives the definition of embarrass as 
  • to place in doubt, perplexity, or difficulties
  • to cause to experience a state of self-conscious distress
  • to become anxiously self-conscious
welcome to my life. 

Yesteday I was so gung-ho.  I was going to get on the scale and *gulp* actually post my starting weight.  It seemed so easy when it was "tomorrow."  Tomorrow wasn't now, wasn't something I had to worry about.  But then a little something sneaky called time happened, and *poof* tomorrow is RIGHT NOW.  I am still focused on moving in the right direction.  I know I am going to have detours and triumphs.  That part I am not worried about.

The part I am worried about is "what's everyone going to think?"  And I shouldn't be.  I can't go get back on the scale now and have it say something different.  Tomorrow I might be able to (there's that tomorrow word again) but there's not a magic pill that will make it happen now.

So while I do still plan on posting my starting weight, I don't have the courage to do it here, yet.  But I will.  Because it's only going to get smaller.  And I am only going to get smaller.  

On a happy note - 
Yesterday I did an exercise dvd that is a really great workout for me.  It's called Pick Your Level: Fat to Fit Fast.  I really do enjoy it.  In the throes of doing it, I hate it with every fiber of my being.  But when I am done, I feel good.  And more importantly, I feel proud of myself! 

This morning when I woke up, I was S.O.R.E.  But a good sore.  And I didn't let it stop me.  I did 32 minutes on the treadmill, keeping a 3.3mph speed.  And coughed up a lung my head off since I still have a bit of a cold.  But I did something. 

In the words of Disney's Meet the Robinsons - KEEP MOVING FORWARD!

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